There are 23 recorded suicides and 230 serious suicide attempts daily in South Africa, according to the South African Depression and Anxiety Group (Sadag).
John*, 52, from Muizenberg, has battled with mental illness for most of his life, and while he hasn’t reached the point of feeling suicidal, he has come close. It’s in those dark moments, he says, that helplines have been a lifeline for him.
Mental illness is a relentless struggle, often borne silently and alone because of stigma and ignorance, but World Mental Health Awareness Month, during October, tries to challenge prevailing public attitudes.
“I have Asperger’s syndrome, a form of autism spectrum disorder, and I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at the age of 14 so, I’ve had my fair share of battles with mental illness,“ says John.
“Also, later in my life, I had substance-abuse issues. I’ve had a really interesting life – a difficult life, but interesting. I’ve come out on the other side.”
John believes there is no one-size-fits-all solution when it comes to mental health.
“Every human being is an individual. Every individual has their own experiences, their own traumas, their own issues, their own families, their own dynamics.”
He is no stranger to helplines, having used them throughout his life.
“I remember one episode during my teenage years when I felt desperate. I wouldn’t say I was suicidal, but I got close. I had some social problems and didn’t know what to do. I called LifeLine, and the lady there was very supportive. I spoke to her three times after that.”
Later in life, he needed help again when his wife became physically abusive.
“I was in a marriage with a highly abusive woman. One day, she physically attacked me, and I went to the police. The police commander laughed at me and told me to go home and ‘handle your wife’, which made me feel emasculated.”
So he called a helpline again, explained that he was bipolar and dealing with an abusive partner and they gave him the number for the South African Mental Health Federation.
That’s how he got in touch with False Bay Hospital psychologist Brett van der Schyff under whose care he has been for the past three years.
John has plenty of praise for those who work on the helplines, calling them “amazing individuals” who show great patience and kindness, but he adds that it also can be very hard for someone to ask for help.
“That’s the hard part,” he says. “Regrettably, many people become trapped in their pain and traumas, which hinders them from seeking the help they need.
“Nothing is permanent. In those moments of desperation, focus on keeping your life simple and don’t dwell on future uncertainties. Everything will eventually pass.”
He adds that helplines also offer guidance to the families of those battling mental illness.
“These helplines are excellent resources, and I believe they are not being fully utilised. It’s also a good idea to find a qualified psychologist to help you.”
Dr Van der Schyff says recent losses, major disappointments, divorce and other big life changes, trauma, and money problems are just some of the factors that can lead to thoughts of suicide.
“Most people can cope with the temporary distress, while acknowledging death is permanent. Unfortunately, some people feel they have no control and see their crisis as inescapable.”
Some warning signs to look out for are intense sadness, disrupted sleep and eating patterns, a lack of hope for the future, feelings of worthlessness and hopelessness, and isolation.
Moreover, talking openly about suicide is often a strong indicator of distress, he says.
He believes that just like with physical health, people need to educate themselves about mental health.
“Recognising warning signs and offering support without adding additional pressure is equally important.
“We also need to reduce stigma and judgement around those who seek support, making it safer for them to seek help.“
People should seek help when their symptoms affect their daily lives, he says, advising family and friends to support them without judgement so that it’s easier for them to ask for help.
“Prioritise your health and remember that there are people who want to see you prosper – you don’t need to walk this road alone.”
Those needing help for mental illness can approach their nearest primary health-care facility or contact Sadag at 0800 21 22 23 (8am to 8pm) or 0800 12 13 14 (8pm to 8am), Lifeline Suicide Crisis Helpline at 0800 121 314, Adcock Ingram Helpline at 0800 708 090, Akeso Psychiatric Response at 0861 435 787, Childline at 0800 055 555 or 116, and Dr Reddy’s Helpline at 0800 212 223.
* Not his real name.
